Most likely you go your way and I’ll go mine

Getting older (yes this may be one of those type of blogs…) brings with it mainly downsides. Heaven will be me and Simy at the age 7 and 9 respectively ctcling round Castlewellan lakes and feeding the ducks before a fried brekkie in the caravan. It has been mostly downhill since then.

Now I’m not at the fat, balding, mid life crisis stage, being mercifully none of the above. But I am finding myself increasingly set in my ways. There was time when enjoying your own company was pleasanty novelty but I find as I get older it becomes something of a neccessity. As I (we?) get older I seem to get less tolerant of other people, other people’s ideas, other people’s personalities, other people’s routines. Used to be you’d stick a stack of us together and we’d just get on with the bant and not think any more about it. Now we’ve all grown up (and thankfully differentiated into actual people as opposed to the homogenous mass of opinion, fashion and personality of being teenagers) and we all (to some degree) need “our own space”, be that physically on our own, or “our own space” in a social setting.

Bottom line, as I get older it seems that I don’t “suffer fools lightly” and perhaps am no where near as (naturally) tolerant as I used to be before I ruined my life by thinking about everything.Far too much I am used to “getting things my own way”. I suspect this is why old people in churches give themselves a bad name (with notable exceptions) and indeed is what scares me about growing up in the church myself.

There are of course plus points, which would inculde (normally) being able to grow a beard. Though perhaps I’m a bit fixated on that one. You’d think by 27 and being neither fat nor balding I’d at least be grateful, and not harping on for some decent facial hair…

But I figure the best thing about getting older (and grumpier and less tolerant) is that you finally get away from that nauseating tendency to care about what other people think. There comes a point where you’re contented to not have the approval of the people around you. And all of a sudden you find yourself free to enjoy things because… well… you actually enjoy them, as opposed to doing them because it is the “done thing.”

Every cloud and all that…

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August 2008
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